Constructing Redwing’s Gambit: Characters and Treatment Part 2 of 5

This was the first paragraph I ever wrote for Redwing’s Gambit. Remember, at the time all I had at my disposal was the d20 version of the game and not the FATE manuscript.

Dan Daget, a salt-of-the-earth Asurburan, is the security chief on a ship called the Haldis. His group, which is led by a sultry Asurburan cyborg named Cass Leary, has been paid by Redwing Securities to transport a high-ranking politician to his new home on Illia* on the other side of the Frontier Zone. Things quickly go awry when evidence of sabotage is found on board and one of their crew members winds up missing. To find out who the culprit is before anyone else gets hurt, Daget must enlist the help of a violent Urseminite named Fang. Will Daget uncover the saboteur and fend off space pirates? Or will he find out that his client is a lot more than they bargained for?



The treatment evolved from the original concept for a number of reasons. At the time, I thought the story required one perspective, but that didn’t turn out to be the case. One mystery in a closed environment was “okay,” but it wasn’t enough for the readers to get a feel of what makes Bulldogs! a cool science fiction setting. Initially, my thinking was that an observant character could really dig into and tell a tale, highlighting the different aspects of the alien races and the worlds. Boy, was that ever wrong! While that technique sounds good, it didn’t work when I started writing it because I bored myself going on and on and on… I’ll talk a lot more about those evolving aspects in parts 3 and 4.

After I wrote up the premise, my next step was to focus on characters. I tweaked the premise to give all of the characters something to do. In other words: why are they traveling through space?

Premise: A group working for Redwing Security has been paid to transport a reformed mobster-turned-politician to his new home on Illia.



In a game, when players are sitting around a table, the GM has to provide the group with a reason to be together. With a full crew and cast of many characters in this story, I had to come up with a short centralized idea or goal that the characters had a vested interest in. The crew works for a company called Redwing Securities and they were paid to transport a new politician named Vincent Twist to the planet Illya. Bam! There’s the central goal. They’re all employees — not pirates, run-a-ways, or rebels — and they have to get a politician from point A to B. Where, when, and how they make it there is another story.

Certainly, any tale that has a crew or a group of characters working together will require this same sort of thing. Star Trek was about a crew that explores space from an archaeological perspective. While there was meta-plot, the episodic format lent itself to “explore strange new worlds.” Star Wars was about Rebels thwarting the Empire. At the heart of Dune was the struggle to control spice on a micro and macro level. Whether it’s on a large scale or a small one, ensemble casts have to have some reason for their existence otherwise the plot will be very convoluted and the reader will get confused. Sometimes the author, too!

From this main premise of transportation, I built the characters and included “the ties that bind.” Or, in other words, how the characters feel about one another. I did this for two reasons: one, this setting and game is owned by Galileo Games. Whenever I write tie-in fiction, I want the publisher to be involved in the creation process because I am writing for them and their fans. Some publishers are more hands on than others, but approvals are still important. Brennan’s feedback and input shaped the story and the characters; you’ll find out more about what Brennan’s involvement was when I talk about revisions.

Here are the character descriptions as I originally wrote them up. You’ll find out what changed (and what stayed the same) as I dive more into the structure and plot next time around. I’d also like to point out that I’m consciously avoiding the mechanical bits because I don’t want to conflict with any future plans Brennan has for these characters. 🙂

Name: Cass Leary
Sex: Female
Class: Engineer, Social (Mata Hari)
Race: Arsubaran Cyborg
Group Role: Team leader
Description: After suffering life-threatening wounds, Cass was brought back to life by Violet Dunn through an experimental procedure. Those who come into contact with her may not realize that she’s a cyborg, for her implants have been well-matched to her red skin, black hair and red eyes. A highly-skilled social artisan, Cass Leary charms all those who cross her path, and has even managed to convince a fierce Urseminite named Fang to be her personal bodyguard. She has no problem diffusing tense situations but prefers not to work with psychics because they cramp her style.
On this mission, Cass’s primary objective is to get Vinnie to his new home on Illia as quickly as possible. Although he was legally elected, she does not trust him — especially around the medical wing where Violet and her young assistant, Edna Keene, spend their time.

Name: Talus Paloç
Sex: Male
Class: Engineer
Race: Dolomé
Group Role: Mechanic
Secondary Group Role: Impromptu Therapist
Description: A well-renowned engineer, Talus is a likeable mechanic whose only flaw is his over-confidence in his abilities. Instead of relying on assistants or apprentices, he often programs robots to perform what he calls “menial tasks.” Because of his magnetic personality, team members often go to him to rant and get advice. Talus is fiercely protective of his friends and loves a good story, but is a little insecure about his appearance. While he has a crush on Cass, if he had a good reason to, he wouldn’t hesitate to kill Fang or the creepy Dan Daget that always seems to be lurking around. After all, he should be the only one with a secret on board.

Name: Vinnie Twist
Sex: Male
Class: Rogue
Race: Ken Reeg
Group Role: Client
Description: A former crime boss, Vinnie Twist recently won the title of High Sadralla of the planet Illia. His recent (and well-publicized) conversion to the Monosolar religion was cited as the primary reason why he was elected to this elite position. A consummate charmer, Vinnie has a soft spot for beautiful women and piles of cash. His personal mantra is not just to get what he wants, but to get what everyone else wants, too. After tying up loose ends in his home colony outside the Frontier Zone, Vinnie hired Redwing Security to safely transport him back to Igdrassa. Since it is common knowledge this small colony sits at the base of the largest gemstone mine on Illia, rumor has it that several space pirates and bounty hunters will try to kidnap him before he sets foot in office.

Name: Dan Daget
Sex: Male
Class: Fighter
Race: Arsuburan
Group Role: Bodyguard
Description: A former professional wrestler, Dan Daget believes that the way to enlightenment is through his physical prowess. When he’s not keeping a close eye on his fellow crew members, he can be found testing his physical limits. Though he’s an excellent listener, Dan has a hard time trusting people. Overprotective at times, Dan won’t hesitate to throw himself in the line of fire for the safety of his crew. On this mission, Cass handpicked Dan from her personal contacts and is paying him extra to keep a close eye on Vinnie Twist.

Name: Violet Dunn
Sex: Female
Class: Medic
Race: Arsuburan
Group Role: Chief Medic
Description: Violet Dunn was a high-ranking military physician before she joined Redwing Securities. She is a pioneer in the field of cybernetics and was the first physician to successfully fuse high-tech robotic parts to Arsuburan flesh. Although she left the military voluntarily, Violet is reluctant to talk about her past and her relationship with Cass Leary. Some of the other crew members don’t trust her because of her mysterious connection to the military. Because she feels like an outsider, Violet often goes out of her way to win her crewmates over by enhancing their abilities or appearances through drugs and surgery. Since she goes wherever Cass goes, Violet had no choice but to join this mission. Violet hasn’t shared her views with anyone else, but she has a personal grudge against the Ken Reeg.

Pilots: Two slug-like beings. Splish and Oogle.

Ship name: Haldis

* Republished from my original notes. The spelling of the planet Illia was changed to Illya for readability and consistency purposes.

Other Parts to this Series

  • Constructing Redwing’s Gambit: Easter Eggs – Part 5 of 5 will be published on April 23, 2012.
  • Constructing Redwing’s Gambit: Revisions and Cut Text – Part 4 of 5 will be published on April 16, 2012.
  • Constructing Redwing’s Gambit: Structure and Plot – Part 3 of 5 will be published on April 9, 2012.
  • You are reading Constructing Redwing’s Gambit: Characters and Treatment – Part 2 of 5
  • Constructing Redwing’s Gambit: Research and Background Part 1 of 5



About Redwing’s Gambit: Redwing’s Gambit, the first novella for the Bulldogs! RPG, debuts today in digital. This story was written by Monica Valentinelli and will be published by Galileo Games, creator of the Bulldogs! RPG. This RPG was originally published with a d20 system in 2005. It has since been updated and released in a new edition which employs the Fate mechanic in 2011.

Constructing Redwing’s Gambit: Research and Background – Part 1 of 5

When I was plotting Redwing’s Gambit, the Fate version of Bulldogs! was just a glimmer in Brennan Taylor’s eye. I knew that the game was going to employ the same system as Spirit of the Century from Evil Hat Productions, but that’s as far as my knowledge went.

The first question I asked myself was not about what story I wanted to write, but how I wanted to present the tale in such a way that felt more like Fate than d20. I had played Spirit of the Century and I also participated in a game run by Ryan Macklin, too. In my mind, Fate really emphasizes and focuses on relationships or the ties that connect and bind the characters to one another.

To help me make my decision, I dove into cinematic reference material to feel out the structure or the architecture of the story. (In other words, I wanted to design an elevator pitch that captured the mood.) Farscape. Star Wars. Firefly. Star Trek. I, Robot. Earth 2. Dune, etc. Of the many science fiction titles I had at my disposal, I leaned more strongly toward a Farscape crossed with Firefly feel. Farscape has a cast of several alien races — including the ship Moya — but still manages to focus on story in spite of the sheer volume of aliens the writers have to describe. Bulldogs! has several alien races and a theological war, too. Firefly has close-knit relationships, all of which are human, but mixes up action and mystery to survive another day.

Now, in both shows, the crews are on-the-run. They’re rogues. Renegades. Pirates. Escapees. I didn’t want to mirror that in my story because I felt it was too easy and distanced itself from the heart of what Bulldogs! is. Sure, there’s pirates in Bulldogs! but the galaxy is only so big and it is at odds with itself. What makes the Bulldogs! setting unique to me are the alien races and how they interact with one another. Those connections create a lot of conflict — which is great for both a game and a story.

Before I could craft a plot, though, I felt I needed to draw up the characters and use the Fate system to ground them. Enter the treatment and the characterization of the full cast and crew.

Other Parts to this Series

  • Constructing Redwing’s Gambit: Easter Eggs – Part 5 of 5 will be published on April 23, 2012.
  • Constructing Redwing’s Gambit: Revisions and Cut Text – Part 4 of 5 will be published on April 16, 2012.
  • Constructing Redwing’s Gambit: Structure and Plot – Part 3 of 5 will be published on April 9, 2012.
  • Constructing Redwing’s Gambit: Characters and Treatment – Part 2 of 5 will be published on April 2, 2012
  • You are reading Constructing Redwing’s Gambit: Research and Background – Part 1 of 5



About Redwing’s Gambit: Redwing’s Gambit, the first novella for the Bulldogs! RPG, debuts today in digital. This story was written by Monica Valentinelli and will be published by Galileo Games, creator of the Bulldogs! RPG. This RPG was originally published with a d20 system in 2005. It has since been updated and released in a new edition which employs the Fate mechanic in 2011.

H.O.N.E.Y. a Free Story from my Morgue

Scrooge McDuck

I am feeling magnanimous today, so much so that after waking up at three o’clock this morning I’ve decided to dip into my Morgue and share with you a piece I wrote back in college. (And later revised slightly for a few grammatical sparkles that, no doubt, savvy proofreaders may argue at length with me about.) It’s definitely a time capsule piece, so I buried in a coffin and forgot about it. Today, in honor of my sheer lack of superstitious feelings for Friday the Thirteenth, I have dug up these pixels from the abyss of my computer just for you!

H.O.N.E.Y.

Glossy plywood stands erect on four walls. A gas fireplace waits anxiously in the corner, its single log hissing for a mate. An imitation bear hide sprawls before it, glass eyes shining from the blue warmth. Leather recliners guard the prize, posted carefully on either side. They, too, gleam oh-ever-so-slightly from the sole source of heat in the cabin. A refrigerator hums itself to sleep apart from them, along the side wall. Its contents wait patiently to be eaten. Beer, store-bought venison, and cocktail weenies. A mousy cabinet waits in the refrigerator’s shadow, full of potato chips, cheez balls, and paper plates. A cardboard table fills the corner with a restless coffee pot and overflowing ash tray. The coffee pot breaks up the log’s mating call with a loud snap, angry for being empty too long. The cigar butts mark a trail through the kitchen to a shy bunk bed, napping in the other corner. Its resting companions are a window and a clock radio. The window dreams. It dreams of Caucasian, middle-aged, overweight male hunters who enjoy smoking and drinking. Abruptly, the clock radio wakes up and speaks in a firm voice.

    “…and today, July seventeenth, 5067, is the day that we commemorate the birthday of Dr. Arnold T. Jujube, founder of the Separatist theory. Arnold is the guy who we all attribute to our way of life today. Isn’t that right, Buffy?

    Yes it is, Biff. But we certainly can not acknowledge this monumental day without also recognizing our late president Robert Radling, great-grandson of that astrology- loving president in the ancient nineteen-eighties. You know, Biff, I can still remember the stories that my great-great-great grandmother used to tell me about that era when I was younger. Imagine stereotyping each decade of a century!

    That is something to think about, Buffy. It is so fascinating to think of how advances in cryogenics have brought families even closer together.

    I know I would never be able to appreciate things like marketing soft-drink names on clothes if it wasn’t for my grammie, Biff. Remember to call your local cryrogenicist today to learn more about your history and appreciate our current way of life!

    Thanks for that heart-wrenching reminder, Buffy. Now here’s time for a little trivia. What is the present-day sector for what used to be the northern part of the former state of Wisconsin? Dial 999-2545 now. That’s 999-2545. Caller number nine will receive a trip to that FABulous sector #87, also known as L.E.A.F. Leo-Erotic-Anal-retentive-Football-players. Who, coincidentally, are all under five feet tall.

    Yum, sounds like the place that I want to be. What if Caller number nine is a heterosexual male?

    Well then, he will win an all-expense paid trip to sector #103, whose acronym is—

    Don’t tell me, don’t tell me! Is it C.H.E.A.P.?

    That’s right, Buffy. Clean-Hard-working-Environmental-Axe-wielding-Potheads. My, you must be up on your geography today.

    Well, Biff, it is SO hard to do nowadays. But I view the holonews every morning for weather and it tells me the climate-controlled temperature in every section!

    Okay, Buffy let’s go to a caller. How are phone lines are a-buzzing. Let’s meet Caller number nine! Hello, you’re on the air with ZNOT.

    Hi guys, um, actually I’m not your Caller number nine. I don’t really know the answer. I just wanted to—

    Well, how ‘bout a consolation prize anyway. Buffy and I will send you a free T-shirt, a complementary coffee mug with our logo embossed in fourteen karat gold, and a FABulous bumper sticker. How do you feel about that?

    Great. Um, can I ask a question?

    Shoot. And don’t forget listeners, we are still waiting for that oh-so-elusive answer to today’s trivia question. Dial 999-2545 now. Go ahead caller, what’s on your mind?

    I just wanted to respond, um. To this whole Separatist thing. I mean, why would you want to create a country that looks like bubble-wrap?

    Oh. Oh! Who do I see a-knocking on our studio door? Here, live and in the flesh, to answer that question is Mr. History guy. Let’s sing that haunting ditty. Shall we, Buffy?

    We shall, Biff.

    Mr. His-to-ry guy. Mr. His-to-ry guy. He knows ev-er-y-thing. Oh yes, he does. Es-pecially about stuff. Stuff we don’t need to know. We’re so hap-py. He’s so mis-er-a-ble. Poor Mr. His-to-ry guy.

    This is Mr. History guy.

    The reason why I called is because I wanted to figure out why we were in these, these bubble things. Every time I’ve asked anyone else, no one seems like they’re able to give me a straight answer. Has life always been this way?

    With the wonder of cryogenics at our disposal, today’s history lesson comes to us from Robert Radling himself. Back a little ways when President Radling got into office, around 2045 or so, life as we know it sucked the big pickle. Asian-Americans were dating Afro-Americans. Full-blooded Americans were sending their children to school with Haitian-Americans. Homosexual girls were found in clubs singing for heterosexual audiences. Things like that. So R&R, as we so lovingly called him, decided we needed to make a drastic change in our lifestyles. So he consulted his mentor and parapsychologist, Dr. Arnold T. Jujube. At first, separations in the gas-permeable, weather-controlled, plasma aerospheres were determined by ascending and descending sun signs. But, when the Saggitarians shot one too many arrows, and the Virgos couldn’t reproduce, Radling decided it was time for a larger change.

    But Mr. History guy, that doesn’t explain how we got into these smaller bubbles.

    Caller, we are not done yet! This portion of today’s history lesson is direct from Dr. Jujubes’ clone! Never lose your loved ones. Live forever without having to bear children the natural, messy way. Clonay, clone today. Take it away, Mr. History Guy.

    Well thank you, Buffy. After consulting Dr. Jujube, Dr. Jujube realized that R&R really was taking some “R&R” when he tried to use only sun signs to classify citizens! So the Dr. slowly poisoned R&R with cyanide to make it look like he had a massive, heart attack. He got away with it, too. I guess Radling’s wife hated him and took the fall. And guess what happened next?

    What Mr. History Guy?

    Dr. Jujube became our very next president. He developed a form known as I.M.B.T.T.R. for placement into the “bubbles.” Race, religion, eating preferences, favorite vacationing spot, tolerance for road rage as well as many other factors played into the thousand-page form. Then, results were tallied and calculated. Those matching over 80% are placed together into an environment. And they are only retested every twenty years! Other than the inter-global incident of 2087 and the disappearance of the former state of Oklahoma, we really haven’t had any problems.

    Thank you Mr. History guy. That answer explained a lot. Do I still get a free T-shirt?

    Well, Caller, I think you more than deserve it. What do you say, Buffy?

    I think that would be swell, Biff. Uh, I mean Mr. History guy. Time to take another caller. Will this one be our Caller number nine. Are you there?

    You’re on the air with ZNOT.

    Ooooooo, I love you guys. Especially you, Biff. Ooooo.

    Why thank you, I’m oh-so-flattered. But do you know the correct answer to today’s trivia question?

    Is the answer to your question sector #53?

    Yes, why Buffy, I think she’s right! But can you give us the acronym for today’s prize?

    H.O.N.E.Y. Hunting-Old-Negligent-Erring-Yodelers.

    Yes that’s correct for a trip to Sector #87! They are yodeling hunters. They are old. They have a norwegian background and they never hit what they shoot at!

    Oooooo, Biff you’re the greatest. Ooooo.

    Now here’s something that will take you back to the time of my great-great-great-grammie. The song is called “Material Girl” and is performed by a woman who professed to be holy!

    That’s FABulous, Buffy. And here you are callers, your flashback to days gone past. You’ve all got it coming to you.

The clock radio sings. The hissing log quiets down and falls asleep, snoring. Blue flames shrink in the fireplace to nothing. After tossing and turning on its burner a few more times, the coffee pot settles down into a melting sleep. The window continues to dream of old men shooting at deer, but never finding their mark.

THE END

[Photo] Haunted Reading




Last night, I attended a reading of HAUNTED: 11 Tales of Ghostly Horror with four of our authors. Pictured (from left to right) the esteemed George Beaverson, yours truly, the fabulous Jason L Blair, the supreme Alex Bledsoe and the witty Bill Bodden.

Thanks to A Room of One’s Own for hosting the reading. Fun was had, books were signed, and stories were read!

Atlas Revealed in New Hero anthology

The cover was just revealed for the New Hero anthology from Stone Skin Press. My vampire detective Atlas makes a stunning debut on the cover art by famed artist Gene Ha.

Atlas is the fifth hero in the second row, right above the “W.” Yes, he is wearing motorcycle gear. Hee. I had so much fun with this particular vampire and the setting I built. Can’t wait to write another one!

New Hero anthology

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