All Your Words And Sriracha Belong To Us

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I am boogie-ing in my chair. Just handed in the last chapter for [redacted]. Exciting! However, I looked at the calendar. I have three major conventions coming up, past-due revisions, and deadlines looming. Though I’ve gotten through 100 pressing e-mails today and am wrapping up a major project, I’ve got more to do. Ergo, social media has got to be cut way back until I achieve my 2013 goals. It just has to happen.

Yesterday I was at sort of a crossroads, but today? Everything sort of crystallized and reaffirmed itself. The thing that’s not valuable to me right now is the news poisoning and I have had it up to ¯ with my governor. I mean, the insanity is beyond ridiculous now, because some old white men who are total strangers to me are legislating my lady bits. Naturally, I am expecting them to be the first in the country to volunteer new laws related to their man parts. What brave heroes are these that they have such an interest in my body.

Anyhoo… Rant over. Well, maybe one more. (You know you love it.) Watched Oz the Great and Powerful. Wow, what a terrible movie. It was marginally related to the books, which I can forgive, but the CGI was obvious, which is hard for me to forgive, and the moral of the story is — doesn’t matter if you’re an asshole or not. Deep down inside, you’re still a “good” guy and you can “change.” Oh, by the way… Women deep down inside are bad. And if you burn them, they’ll only get worse. But if you love them? They’ll stay good. Huzzah! I’m SO relieved!

I’m off to try to watch another movie. Cloud Atlas. Hopefully this one is better. BUT! Before I go! I have a recipe for you that is so incredibly awesome you will wonder if it is a sin to eat it.

I give you… A new/old concoction… That I forgot but made again… And now has a fancy new name…

HELL’S BELLS PASTA BOWL

(3) Fresh Green Onions, thinly-sliced
(1) Orange Pepper, thinly-sliced
Cilantro
Garlic
Ground Peanuts
Sriracha
Lt. soy sauce
Smooth, creamy peanut butter
Shaved parmesan/romano
Whole wheat spaghetti

Boil pasta al dente. Drain. In the hot pan, add enough peanut butter to coat the bottom. Shake 2 to 3 soy sauceness and a few scribbles of Sriracha or however much you can tolerate. Add cilantro and garlic. Toss with the spaghetti and sprinkle the cheese and peanuts over the top.

Oh, and add more Sriracha.

ENJOY!

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Monica Valentinelli is an author, artist, and narrative designer who writes about magic, mystery, and mayhem. Her portfolio includes stories, games, comics, essays, and pop culture books.

In addition to her own worlds, she has worked on a number of different properties including Vampire: the Masquerade, Shadowrun, Hunter: the Vigil, Brandon Sanderson’s Mistborn, and Robert E. Howard’s Conan.

Looking for Monica’s books and games that are still in print? Visit Monica Valentinelli on Amazon’s Author Central or a bookstore near you.

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